Taller
by POAS
Summary: [COMPLETE]First: Vegeta calls Bulma Short, Gokus's Nads are BRUISED, Goten and Trunks play barbie Second: Vegeta threatens Bulma with no Sex, Goten and Trunks unlock Barbie's secret level. Third: Sex Ed. and Sex Fourth: THE END!
1. Taller

Taller  
  
By:  
  
POAS  
  
Vegeta and Bulma have a silly argument it's short lived. Pun intended.  
  
I don't own DBZ! MOFOS!  
  
Vegeta glanced at Bulma as she 'blah-blah-blahed' about her bad day at work and having to stay overtime. Saiyans had bad days too, ya know. He was forced to baby-sit Goten AND Trunks just because Goten was staying the night and Bulma wasn't there. Those stupid kids ate all his favorite cereal and left him hardly any milk, damn brats.  
  
"I'm taller than you," he said suddenly, changing the subject.  
  
She huffed loudly but continued her search for food. He chuckled a bit, yup yup yup.  
  
"I'm taller than you," he began teasing.  
  
"So, it's all my fat holding me down," she quipped.  
  
He looked at her up and down, sure, he mocked her weight but she was nowhere near fat. Stupid onna.  
  
"I'm still taller than you."  
  
"Gravity and fat."  
  
"Lose some fat, then we'll talk."  
  
She huffed again, turning to face him. He was smirking that damnable smirk of his and she could see the amusement in his eyes. She looked down at his chest and grinned before looking up.  
  
"My boobs are bigger," her grin got wider as his eyes did.  
  
"One, you're an onna, and two, you had a brat," he smirked.  
  
She huffed loudly, stupid Saiyan and his stupid thing for paying attention at times it wasn't needed.  
  
"I'm still taller than you," he chuckled.  
  
She growled at him, a fierce growl of animalistic anger before huffing and turning back into the fridge.  
  
"I win," he smirked.  
  
"Oh yea, well Goku's taller than you!"  
  
His left eye twitched in annoyance. Stupid onna and her stupid thing for paying attention at times it wasn't needed. He shrugged slowly though, an action the Saiyan rarely did.  
  
"I'm still taller than you and that's what's important," he said with finality.  
  
At that precise moment Goku instant transmission-ed into the house and into the kitchen.  
  
"I'm taller than you Vegeta!" he grinned stupidly.  
  
Vegeta kicked the taller Saiyan in the groin and made him fall onto his knees.  
  
"Not anymore," he chuckled evilly. "And thanks for bowing to your Prince."  
  
Seeing her friend in distress and wanting to end this silly argument once and for all, Bulma did the same to Vegeta who promptly fell over and whimpered lightly.  
  
"I'm taller than both of you, my boobs are bigger, and you both bowed to ME!!" she cackled with glee.  
  
"Oh yea?" Vegeta questioned. "You just kicked my nads. . . No sex for you!"  
  
Bulma howled her distress to the moon while Goten and Trunks giggled around the corner. Trunks placed the phone onto the receiver, passing Goten one of his father's smirks.  
  
"Stupid adults," he chuckled softly.  
  
"Let's go play Barbie!" Goten grinned.  
  
"Now that's an idea!"  
  
Both boys ran up to Trunks' room with glee while their fathers were on the floor holding themselves and Bulma was crying in the fetal position. All was well at Capsule Corp.  
  
AN: I had the argument about height with my mom, lol. The things that inspire me. . .  
  
POAS 


	2. No Gravity, No Sex Or Is It No Sex, No...

Chapter Two  
  
No Gravity, No Sex . . . Or Is It No Sex, No Gravity  
  
The second and final chapter in the "Taller" fiction. Enjoy!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Vegeta sat on a small stool in the laboratory part of Capsule Corp. as his wife harassed him for breaking his machine once again. He, of course, had attempted to fix the stupid thing but some piece of missing and he didn't know what or where it was.  
  
"I can't believe you broke it!" she screamed at him. (Cliché? Who me?)  
  
"I can't believe you won't fix it or give me the piece," he said slowly.  
  
"Don't talk to me like I'm stupid!!"  
  
"You are stupid."  
  
"I am not stupid!"  
  
"I'm smarter than you!"  
  
"Oh here we go!"  
  
"No gravity room, no sex for Bulma!" he yelled.  
  
Her face dropped, he knew her leash that darn Saiyan. She watched as her husband smirked at her, that devilishly sexy smirk of his. A thin ribbon of drool slipped from the corner of her mouth as dirty thoughts entered her mind and Vegeta scowled.  
  
"Perverted little onna," he chuckled softly.  
  
"Yea well, no sex no gravity room!" she grinned triumphantly.  
  
Vegeta's left eye twitched; once again, his stupid little onna had used his words against him. He pouted softly, his bottom lip quavering a bit. He looked down at his feet and began to shift them uncomfortably.  
  
"If I don't train today, I won't come to bed and you'll still get no sex," he murmured softly.  
  
"That's why we'll go at it now!" Bulma argued softly.  
  
He dropped his act and glared hatefully at the onna he had so stupidly married, maybe she was smarter than he was. He rolled his eyes at her when she grinned at his defeat.  
  
"'Mnotinthemood," he said quietly.  
  
Bulma's fall fell as she fell head over heels to the floor. Vegeta shrugged and began walking away. "Fix my gravity room onna, pleasure later." Bulma ran to grab her toolbox as she raced after the Saiyan. Zero gravity sex was a dream of hers. Heh, heh, heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!  
  
Trunks and Goten listened from the stairwell.  
  
"Your mom and dad fight a lot," Goten whispered.  
  
"I think they do it for the make-up sex," Trunks frowned thoughtfully.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Let's go play Barbie some more, maybe we can get her and Ken to break up and then have make up sex," the older demi-Saiyan said, walking up the stairs.  
  
"Trunks-kun?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"What's sex?"  
  
Trunks paused thoughtfully. "Dunno," he shrugged. The demi-Saiyans went upstairs to Trunks' room, got on the Internet and found the codes to unlock "Barbie's Sex Adventures". All was doomed at Capsule Corp.  
  
AN: Wow, maybe I should rate this PG-13. . . LOL. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this little two parter. More short stories to come and if you want to read some of my longer ones they're on my other account: DJ Purple. Only one up so far, the others are being edited as we sleep.  
  
The one and only on fanfiction.net,  
  
POAS 


	3. Sex Fiends

Chapter Three  
  
Sex Fiend(s)  
  
AN: Yea, this is PG-13 now, lol. Heed that. Booya!  
  
POAS  
  
PS: I don't own DBZ, I woulda made GT better.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Vegeta sat up with his mane in shambles, and his eyes half open. His wife simply grinned evilly at him when he looked back at her. Grabbing her husband's shoulders, the blue haired beauty yanked her half naked, wide- eyed husband back for another round. He almost whined.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"I didn't know you could do that!" Goten exclaimed.  
  
"How'd he get her legs that far back?" Trunks asked, his left ear resting on his left shoulder.  
  
"I think I saw Gohan do that to Videl once."  
  
"My papa can do that!"  
  
"Holy moly!!"  
  
"So that's where babies come from."  
  
"I think I'm gonna be sick!" *barf*  
  
"SICK!"  
  
"I want my mommy!"  
  
Both Goten and Trunks turned away from the TV; sometimes the Discovery Channel was not the best channel for children. Especially the Discovery Health Channel on baby night. Trunks shuddered as he turned on his Play Station-X Squared Times Pi to the Fifth, no more baby channel. With that slightly behind him, he put in the Barbie game and grabbed his code sheet. Dear Kami, no.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Vegeta gasped for air, it suddenly becoming too stuffy for the Saiyan then he realized he had passed out with his wife's bosom in his face. How embarrassing.  
  
"Again," Bulma said softly, plopping onto the floor with a thud.  
  
"I think seven times is enough, Bulma," Vegeta half panted, half groaned.  
  
"I only had fourteen orgasms."  
  
"Bulma . . . No more, I can only take so much," he closed his eyes.  
  
"Wuss," she murmured.  
  
"Maybe so, but it hurts now," he said with finality, turning on his side and yanking his shorts up.  
  
"I can kiss it better," she said with an evil glint.  
  
Vegeta's eyes nearly fell out of his head.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Trunks and Goten watched as Barbie did something they should never see a woman do ever, ever, ever! She was washing the dishes by hand when she had just gotten a manicure! What was wrong with her!? Nevertheless, she was naked, Goten and Trunks reasoned and naked was good.  
  
"Trunks-kun?" Goten asked quietly.  
  
"Yea, Goten," the drooling demi-Saiyan said softly.  
  
"When's the make-up sex?"  
  
"Ehhh! She's naked and doing the dishes, Ken is out with another girl. Make- up sex in three Barbie days."  
  
"How long are Barbie days?"  
  
"About five minutes depending on the demented child with the Barbie."  
  
"Ah."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"I can't take anymore," Vegeta said softly, shifting into another position.  
  
Bulma put her leg over his taut behind, causing him to fall onto the brightly colored Twister© mat (don't own it).  
  
"Right leg blue," she chuckled.  
  
"Bulma, first you make me have sex with you, then you make me play Twister! You're evil!"  
  
"Three more times," she held up three fingers.  
  
"Of what?"  
  
"SEX!!"  
  
"Damn it, Bulma, no!"  
  
Vegeta watched as his wife gathered tears into her big blue eyes. He sighed softly before holding up two fingers. She squealed at the chance and tackled the reluctant Saiyan warrior. She was a sex fiend.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"She can get an STD like that!!" Trunks yelled at Barbie as she did the unthinkable.  
  
"No she can't!" Goten argued. "It's clean!"  
  
"Yes she can!"  
  
"Can't!"  
  
"CAN!"  
  
"CAN'T!!!!"  
  
"She can too, just turn on the Discovery Channel!"  
  
Trunks' face when white, there was no way he was ever watching that channel again. He was just going to have to get the parental code and block that channel, no more "where babies come from" nonsense! Freakin' educational disadvantages.  
  
Trunks watched as Barbie took a long drag from a cigarette in her mouth; ah, life was good. Goten looked at Ken, who appeared to be half dead from the humping punishment Barbie had given him. He would never cheat on her . . . again.  
  
"Sex fiend," Trunks murmured.  
  
"Huh?" Goten grunted.  
  
"Heard my dad say it once."  
  
"Oh."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"I said two!" Vegeta argued softly.  
  
"Two, four, same difference," Bulma grinned evilly.  
  
Vegeta sighed loudly; he wondered what those brats had been up to for the past, Vegeta looked down at his watch, eight hours. He thought they would be hungry and bug them, but nope. Hmm, they must have felt their Kis and thought it best to stay away. Either that or they were playing that Barbie game Goten fell in love with. Knowing his son, he had unlocked some secret Barbie sex level and learned about where babies come from in one sitting.  
  
Bulma grinned proudly, no matter how much Vegeta complained about it, he seemed to enjoy the act. She, on the other hand, still wanted more and placed a gentle hand on her husband's shoulder to let him know.  
  
"Oh, no you don't!" he yelled.  
  
Disappointed, Bulma floated down to the gravity controls and turned off the gravity. Zero gravity sex and Twister, how she loved that man.  
  
"I'm never letting you do that again," he groaned. "I'm going to be so sore in the morning."  
  
"I can help work out those knots," she winked.  
  
"In your dreams!"  
  
"There too, can we really do that?" she asked eagerly.  
  
"Sex fiend!"  
  
"You wouldn't have me any other way."  
  
Vegeta watched as his Bulma walked away, her legs moving a bit out of sync, maybe one more time wouldn't hurt. Perverted little Saiyan.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Goten and Trunks sat on the floor with their hair seemingly stuck backwards. Life was good . . . they thought. Discovery Channel was not good on baby night, they knew. At least they were still young boys, or this would've traumatized them. If they hadn't been already. The mini sex fiends!  
  
AN: That was weird. Heh.  
  
POAS 


	4. In Closing

Chapter Four  
  
In Closing . . .  
  
Trunks looked back on his life and realized he was only eight years old and couldn't remember last week. He blinked as he remembered the day where he learned it all: where babies came from, he shuddered, that his dad was whipped, and that ChiChi means boobs and Goku like boobs and saying boobies around him made him go bonkers and attack his wife and. . . Among other things, consummate her. He heard that on some TV show. Back to the point, Trunks had learned a lot and would like to thank POAS for teaching him!  
  
"What's with the knife, Trunks?" POAS asked the demi-Saiyan.  
  
"Oh nothing!" Trunks said happily.  
  
POAS watched as Trunks cut up some oranges and threw the slices at her. She simply blinked before going SUPER AUTHOR and placed him in a headlock. Trunks now knew why his dad was so whipped. So in closing, Trunks would like to say this.  
  
"POAS doesn't own DBZ and . . ." reads off a sheet of paper, "In closing, boobies are nice, soft, and round and. . . OW!"  
  
"Stick to the script," POAS muttered.  
  
"NOTHING BUT THE KNIFE TO LIVE FOR FAT BOY!!!"  
  
"Couldn't have said it better myself!"  
  
POAS and Trunks disappear into the sunset, bringing an end to a hilari-ass fanfiction.  
  
Taller brought to you in part by Slim Shady, I mean Akira Toriyama, Toei, Bird Studios, FunImation Productions, and the wicked twisted mind of POAS! GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
AN: O_O  
  
POAS 


End file.
